Category Archives: Musings, Ventings, & Other Personal Posts. AKA Articles

Professional Shaman. World Tree Resurrection

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Eagle with Iris in Great Darkness, OutlawBunny.

Eagle with Iris in Great Darkness, OutlawBunny.

This post is roughly-written, but felt important to post stat, for my personal growth. Spent the morning pouring my heart out in this, I hope you read it.

My commitment to being a professional shaman must be made daily.

Today is Feb 5. The World Tree resurrects today. It is a day to plant.

Ancient MetsoaAmerican merchants traded in sacred good, items of great mystic worth.

From an anthropological view, if you don’t charge for it, it ain’t shamanism. (I support all definitions of shamanism. I mention the anthropological one contextually.)

I tell myself, “Come into the market place, again, today. Do not be stopped by those with dubious claims to power, who brag about alliance with death.”

Francesca De Grandis, May 2012

Francesca De Grandis, May 2012

I tell myself, “Yes, they hurt my feelings and make it hard for people to understand my work enough to know it might really help them. Yes, this immense pain makes my tears appropriate. Cry, do cry. But remember that anyone wrongly claiming they belong to a fierce god of war or death or the underworld is a deluded pawn of the evil bastardization of such a god. They don’t just cause harm, they too suffer. (I’m not referring to an innocently mistaken choice of a patron deity, but an arrogant choice.)

I tell myself, “They’re children playing at grown up, teenagers claiming selves in loud clothes. Like foolish adolescents, they careen in magic cars, injuring or killing themselves and others. But there is nothing I can do, until they know they need help. Move on. Some day, they’ll know better. Then they’ll be attacked and have to learn to cleave to honest paths despite. Ultimately, we are all in this together.”

I leave behind my fantasy of telling them, “Ancient MesoaAmerican football was sacred, the losing team was beheaded, you are not up to that game.” They would not understand. Which makes me utterly frustrated. I leave behind my frustration.

I admit and honor my powerlessness. I focus on me, tell myself, “Honor your healing magic by selling it. Honor your ability as a shamanic guide by selling it. Make beauty with your magic and sell it. Become part of the market.”

Today, I remind myself today, “Every Mayan king was a shaman. Yes, admit in your gut that you’re attacked by those trapped in the modern american division of sacred and profane, market and magic. Admit in your gut how badly they treat you and how hard they make it for you. Then take time for self-compassion. Then stop thinking about finding self, heck, stop trying to find self. Go sell self. Only in service do we find self and fully heal self.”

People attack me instead of facing that they’re not willing to get into the game of life and marketplace. My preoccupation with them is my way of avoiding life and marketplace. :-)What a self-perpetuating cycle of avoidance! So I focus on my own failings and on being of service. I focus on today!

EagleWithIrisDetailI pray, “Hermes, Mercury, Exu, open the road and gate to my profession today, that I may serve.Open the road and gate within my heart today, that I may serve. Open the road and gate, today, for the person whose needs and goals are well met by my particular shamanic skill set. Guide my day in the divine marketplace, today. Help me be a sacred merchant, today. Help me try and try and try, today, for to be a professional shaman who is well-serving community means to ever be resurrected, both in my private life and daily in my commitment to the market place.” (I support all definitions of shamanism. This paragraph is specific to a moment in time.)

I post this today, because my heart needs to touch someone who will understand my pain, my commitment, my happiness in my work, and in hopes the post will help them. Please tell me if you understand and/or if this post helps.

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Here’s a description of my shamanic counseling sessions. And you can schedule online. http://www.outlawbunny.com/pastoral-counseling/

Hands

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imageHands

I heard words about silence,
again.
And again.
Eloquence can lead us toward a stilled hush,
but “toward” is not “at.”

Our poems and prayers
sometimes muzzle God,
leave Divinity mute,
unable to speak except for the hollow terror we feel
for lack of touching Her palm
with our small empty
fragile fingers.

So I got silent to hear God.

Afterwards, I wrote a poem describing what happened:

“The silent voice
tells me, ‘Love.’
More than tells me,
also gives me
the ability.”

Did writing the poem about the ability
make me lose the ability?
I am more and more dissatisfied
with my words, your words,
I want to just be with you, holding hands,
in God’s company.
__________________
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I’m so excited to offer Archetype Coaching in a one-hour appointment, instead of only as part of something else—such as a class—which is how I have done it til now! https://stardrenched.com/archetype-coaching/

Four Things (Oral Tradition)

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Nov, 2012

If someone wanted me for a Faerie teacher, and was deciding which of my classes to take, here are four things I’d want to tell them:

Faerie art, Francesca De Grandis

Faerie art, Francesca De Grandis: With my winged cat, in my astral home. Visit me, by phone. We will travel other realms. (Click on this pic to see it large and clear.)

1) Don’t wait until I offer the “right” class. My class descriptions can be irrelevant. Oral tradition classes can’t be described. Use your intuition about whether to enroll in whatever class I’m currently offering. You might also need to ask yourself whether waiting for the “right” class is a way to put off self-empowerment ad infinitum.

2) The important thing is not class descriptions. It is being together. You want to learn shamanism, sit next to a shaman. (We do “sit,” side by side, long-distance, in classes by phone.) Some of the most advanced lessons I’ve given, if observed by a passer by, seemed just a trip to the grocery store. Saying, “We’re going to the grocery store” is not an inviting class description, lol.

3) If you want to grow in the Faerie Faith, do not wait for me to offer a class described as helping you do that. Take whatever class I offer now. Everything I offer is Faerie Faith. I’m Faerie. Faerie isn’t something I sometimes do. It is what I am. A Faerie does not run around talking about Faerie. She simply is what she is. Come be you, with me. You will become more you.

Faerie art, Francesca De Grandis4) What is done in my classes is invisible. The heart of life is invisible. The strongest magic is not in my books, nor what I post on social media, it is what I do unseen, it is what you do unseen. Oral tradition is unseen. And, were it observed, it would seem unspectacular, ordinary, as if there were a circle around us keeping anyone outside it from feeling the power. That is part of what makes it secret, part of the great mysteries: most magic is not spoken or observable or describable. It is lived. It is shared by being together. Being. It is a simple state of being, simple but hard to achieve. Come be be be be with me.

With love, Francesca

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For upcoming classes and other news go here https://stardrenched.com/category/upcoming-classes-events-and-other-news/ and here too: http://www.outlawbunny.com/category/news/

Being Seen in Truth

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Self-portrait

Self-portrait

Recently, a new student told me, “I expected to be blown away, but not in the very first class. Wow!” That felt great, but frustrating, because my work’s exceptional quality is hard to believe, so when I describe the nature of my classes and counseling, and the benefits of working with me, it sounds like promotional hype or an ego party.

(I should represent my work as mediocre, more people might study with me, LOL!)

It is crazy-making to be extraordinarily gifted and not get to use that as much as I could to serve folks, bc some fool told them my class descriptions are hype. Ok. End of vent. Thanks for letting me get that off my chest.

The solution: I trust the Universe is divinely, correctly aligned; I keep telling the truth re who I am and what I do; and I hold foremost in my thoughts the immense blessing I am given—that some folks fully see me, the same way I see them; as I reflect their full beauty and power back to them when we work together, they are my fellow seekers, awesome camaraderie and support in my spiritual growth.
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I’m so excited to offer Archetype Coaching in a one-hour appointment, instead of only as part of something else—such as a class—which is how I have done it til now! https://stardrenched.com/archetype-coaching/

Solstice Snow-Kitty

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The kitten almost knocked over huge houseplants trying to get a good view out the window. I figure that was pretty clear guidance from the Universe to take a break from shipping books and go outside with my kitten into the snow.

Our venture probably lasted only ten minutes, and was just us hanging out. But I felt joy and wonder.

Cosmic Cat Nap, Francesca De Grandis

I feel blessed today that I find immense joy in small things, despite daily challenges that would’ve killed many people in both spirit and body. I also feel the hope that my classes impart the same sense of miracle in the wee gifts amidst enormous difficulties. That is not necessarily spelled out in my curriculum descriptions, but it is innate in an authentic spiritual teaching and methodology: life brings challenges, and with them great sorrow; life also brings us great joy if we open to it despite our struggles.

There are, of course, times when trauma or other challenges will overwhelm. Then my job during class or a counseling session is not to be a Pollyanna who callously insists, “If you were really spiritual, you would be cheerful anyway!” The recent deaths of Connecticut children has us deeply grieving. At such times, I share coping and grieving tools, ways to heal, and methods to overcome problems.

We cannot always have the joy the World Tree offers us, and must face inevitable pain. My hope, in my heart today, is that I help my students and clients do that and also help them find as much joy as possible, when it is possible. I am an ecstatic, in love with the world tree, and I believe, deep in the cells of my heart, that the world tree is in love with each of us, so It wants to celebrate existence with us.

On solstice day, I smile thinking about my little faerie kitten looking up at the snow, studying it thoughtfully, and I wish you happy solstice.

____________________
I experience profound love from—and connectivity with—the Divine. Do you want spiritual reading that reflects accessible Divine love? How about that honors your idea of Divinity (e.g., God, Goddess, God within, World Tree, Universe)? Read Sprinkling Faerie Dust on Breakfast. Available here: https://www.etsy.com/listing/114317006/sprinkling-faerie-dust-on-breakfast

Santa and My New Familiar (Cute Kitty Pics)

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As some of you know, Santa is in my pantheon. Being a good pagan god, he is not distant and inaccessible. He visits me all year. In November, he came over and got to know my new familiar.

They had a great time! Look at the pic below, kitty is clearly telling us, “Santa loves me!”

She also said, “And I love Santa!” She wasn’t fibbing, you can see it in her eyes.

Then she told me, “Santa Claus is not a stuck up God. Santa lets me climb him!” The pic below proves it!

(Yup, Santa doesn’t always wear his red suit, sometimes he likes to hang out in a sweatshirt.)

have a great season!
____________________
I experience profound love from—and connectivity with—the Divine. Do you want spiritual reading that reflects accessible Divine love? How about that honors your idea of Divinity (e.g., God, Goddess, God within, World Tree, Universe)? Read Sprinkling Faerie Dust on Breakfast. Available here: https://www.etsy.com/listing/114317006/sprinkling-faerie-dust-on-breakfast

There Are Ghosts in All Our Heads

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The word “red” means red.
“Apple” means apple.
If someone thinks I said,
“I’m eating an orange,”
they’re listening to a ghost,
not to me.

They will tell you I
said things that I didn’t.

We all have ghosts
that smother our ears.

——————–
Sprinkling Faerie Dust on Breakfast. Powerful reading that is short enough to fit into your day. Available only from the author: https://www.etsy.com/listing/114317006/sprinkling-faerie-dust-on-breakfast

America Allows Holiday Magic

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I adore the holiday season, because it is the one time of year that America, as a whole, lets itself believe in magic & miracle, & allows itself wildly jubilant decor that is in “bad” taste.

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Beloved Fellow Seeker, Thank you for your spiritual journey, because I can’t grow spiritually alone.

I wrote a book, out of gratitude for you and love for you: “Sprinkling Faerie Dust on Breakfast: A Daily Reader for Busy Parents and Their Children . . . and for Any Way-Busy Person.”

Spiritual reading that fits into your day and supports travelers of any spiritual path.

Only available from the author. Buy it here: http://etsy.me/W5GJs4 Thank you again!

Inherent Magic & Fundie Paganism

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Magic is a flow within the fabric of reality. Magic is also a state of being inherent in all living things. Magic is also living in myth, actually living it. And magic is love. Fundamentalist religion, including fundamentalist Wicca, squelches one’s magical being, squelches one’s love, and separates one from the larger flow of loving magic. If you judge others’ magic, your own may weaken.

*******
Beloved Fellow Seeker, Thank you for your spiritual journey, because I can’t grow spiritually alone.

I wrote a book, out of gratitude for you and love for you: “Sprinkling Faerie Dust on Breakfast: A Daily Reader for Busy Parents and Their Children . . . and for Any Way-Busy Person.”

Spiritual reading that fits into your day and supports travelers of any spiritual path.

Only available from the author. Buy it here: http://etsy.me/W5GJs4 Thank you again!

Blessing This Site #3

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The Generous Sun – Francesca De Grandis, 2012. In gratitude, I painted this fantasy portrait of Kathleen. We’ve been doing projects together since the 80s, and it is always a joy.

This post is to express gratitude for the banners on this site. First: gratitude to the amazing artist, Kathleen Marshall, who made all but two of the banners that go across the top of this site’s pages. She made 13, one to top each page. Her work is a blessing, do wander the site to see it! If you see a top banner, it is by her, except for two I did: One on the “My Other Site” page, and one to use when we need an additional banner here on out; to see the latter click here. I also have reason to be grateful for those two I made, and the ones I made for the sidebar, read on.

I want to share gratitude because I’ve felt in sync with wild Fey gods re the banners, and everything else to do with revitalizing this site. It seems like my Gods are blessing the site. Publically sharing a few banner moments I am grateful for feels like a way to keep the good juju going, so let me continue:

The painting I did for Kathleen to use for the banners constituted real improvement for me, and any improvement I make as an artist, spiritual being, or anything else is Goddess-given. I painted the piece as a magical touchstone for the site, wanting to create a landscape within the Fey realms. Was very surprised it actually looks the way parts of Faerie appear to me. I was mega-shocked I’d actually pulled it off—but, then, LOL, I’m such a novice-painter that I’m easily impressed with anything I do. “Ooh, I drew something that kind of looks like a face, wow, i can kinda draw a face.”

Another blessing was my equal surprise about the calligraphy I sent Kathleen for the banners (I did all the calligraphy). Aside from one or two lessons from mom, I’m self-taught. I’ve been calligraphing on and off since I was 14 and, with these banners, was finally happy with calligraphy I’ve done. I honestly didn’t like my calligraphy until now. (I am in my sixties. It just goes to show, persistence pays.)

Another blessing was getting to try digital art during the banner making process. Oh Goddess mine, I adore doing digital art, thank you for sending it my way. So all side banners (they are at the bottom for some browsers, and may not be on all pages yet) are my doing. The fantasy portrait of Kathleen is also done digitally. The digital art started me doing fantasy portraits, which I have luuuved painting!

Thank you for sharing a bit of my gratitude. That in itself is a profound blessing. Below, please add a verbal blessing if you want. Or make another sort of comment – hey, it will be a blessing in its own way. Love and peace, out.