Connectivity, Ecstasy, Service

If we believe in the pantheist or Taoist principle of all things being connected, we walk our talk by serving all things. As an ecstatic, I find heart-rendering joy through service.

We are part of a great weave. Call it the World tree, the dance of life, the Tao—call it Fred. We can be codependent in this weave, or we can have boundaries but still be within it. We can fight it, or we can be fed by. And we can surrender to it.

Surrender can be just a fancy pompous word unless we are of service. There are other ways one must follow through on the notion of surrender for it to actually be surrender, but for now let’s focus on service.

But before we do, I need to add an aside: I am not suggesting we must perfectly attain any of the ideals I set forth here. I would be a hypocrite to suggest I have anywhere near attained these ideals myself. I do cleave to these ideals, and do my best to achieve them (though my best is often poor), and this is all my Gods ask of me.

Okay, back to service. We can serve the weave. My belief and experience is that, if we believe the Taoist or pantheist principle of all things being connected, we walk our talk by serving all things. Serving community, serving Gaia, serving all of life, serving family, serving one’s spiritual tradition(s) and spiritual teacher(s) and spiritual student(s), serving one’s Gods.

We must also serve self, self is part of the weave. Sometimes, we best serve by serving self alone. For example, when we are ill or need to build courage to serve others. Or when we simply need time alone to enjoy ourselves.

Ultimately, to be part of the weave, we serve in surrender. I often forget that. In other words, when my Gods ask me to do something, I often try to set about doing it my way instead of Theirs. But to really do that which my Gods ask me, I must also implement it the way They ask. (Oh, my, in this essay, surrender becomes service becomes surrender.)

When we serve, we align ourselves within the weave, we start flowing with it. We start being fed by it in ways that we cannot otherwise. There is healing and empowerment not otherwise available.

What’s more, we experience connectivity so sublime that it is orgasmic. Literally orgasmic. I have great orgasms because I am of service.

I painted this blessing  banner quite a while ago, but post it here bc it is in the spirit of my prayer.

I painted this blessing banner quite a while ago, but post it here bc it is in the spirit of my prayer.

Being of service is truly pagan, it’s not a wimpy trait, it is part of ecstasy. Not only ecstasy between the sheets but also an ecstatic way of life—being joyfully within the weave whether it’s with your family, your coworkers, a beautiful summer day, or the stars in the sky.

I am blessed to feel connected to every star in the universe and know the thrill of all starlight radiating around me, with me, through me. I know this weave because I am blessed to be of service.

My prayer: Gods, I know that serving is a blessing to me, because all things come from you—my breath, my ability to rise in the morning, my joy, my serving. Everything of me is from you. So do not let me think that my service to others makes me superior. Getting the chance to serve others makes me very very lucky! It is to you I must turn if I want to serve: I pray, please bless me with the power to serve—including the willingness to serve. And bless me with the humility to serve in surrender—when You set me a task, help me implement it the way You ask.

CnslingBotmBnr

Sleep is the Goddess’s embrace

imageI must not undervalue sleep. Sleep is the Goddess’s embrace, every night is a substantive healing and empowerment. Sleep solves problems that many people think only pharmaceutical medication can repair. I must cherish and seek sleep with the rigor, focus, and planning that I have when I pursue wholesome food, right-livelihood, connection with Divinity. Every night is a free pass to connect with Divinity; by falling asleep, I surrender to the Goddess’s care, allow all Her love to fill me, my every cell becoming replete with Her power.

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For upcoming classes and other news go here https://stardrenched.com/category/upcoming-classes-events-and-other-news/ and here too: http://www.outlawbunny.com/category/news/

Professional Shaman. World Tree Resurrection

Eagle with Iris in Great Darkness, OutlawBunny.

Eagle with Iris in Great Darkness, OutlawBunny.

This post is roughly-written, but felt important to post stat, for my personal growth. Spent the morning pouring my heart out in this, I hope you read it.

My commitment to being a professional shaman must be made daily.

Today is Feb 5. The World Tree resurrects today. It is a day to plant.

Ancient MetsoaAmerican merchants traded in sacred good, items of great mystic worth.

From an anthropological view, if you don’t charge for it, it ain’t shamanism. (I support all definitions of shamanism. I mention the anthropological one contextually.)

I tell myself, “Come into the market place, again, today. Do not be stopped by those with dubious claims to power, who brag about alliance with death.”

Francesca De Grandis, May 2012

Francesca De Grandis, May 2012

I tell myself, “Yes, they hurt my feelings and make it hard for people to understand my work enough to know it might really help them. Yes, this immense pain makes my tears appropriate. Cry, do cry. But remember that anyone wrongly claiming they belong to a fierce god of war or death or the underworld is a deluded pawn of the evil bastardization of such a god. They don’t just cause harm, they too suffer. (I’m not referring to an innocently mistaken choice of a patron deity, but an arrogant choice.)

I tell myself, “They’re children playing at grown up, teenagers claiming selves in loud clothes. Like foolish adolescents, they careen in magic cars, injuring or killing themselves and others. But there is nothing I can do, until they know they need help. Move on. Some day, they’ll know better. Then they’ll be attacked and have to learn to cleave to honest paths despite. Ultimately, we are all in this together.”

I leave behind my fantasy of telling them, “Ancient MesoaAmerican football was sacred, the losing team was beheaded, you are not up to that game.” They would not understand. Which makes me utterly frustrated. I leave behind my frustration.

I admit and honor my powerlessness. I focus on me, tell myself, “Honor your healing magic by selling it. Honor your ability as a shamanic guide by selling it. Make beauty with your magic and sell it. Become part of the market.”

Today, I remind myself today, “Every Mayan king was a shaman. Yes, admit in your gut that you’re attacked by those trapped in the modern american division of sacred and profane, market and magic. Admit in your gut how badly they treat you and how hard they make it for you. Then take time for self-compassion. Then stop thinking about finding self, heck, stop trying to find self. Go sell self. Only in service do we find self and fully heal self.

People attack me instead of facing that they’re not willing to get into the game of life and marketplace. My preoccupation with them is my way of avoiding life and marketplace. :-)What a self-perpetuating cycle of avoidance! So I focus on my own failings and on being of service. I focus on today!

EagleWithIrisDetailI pray, “Hermes, Mercury, Exu, open the road and gate to my profession today, that I may serve.Open the road and gate within my heart today, that I may serve. Open the road and gate, today, for the person whose needs and goals are well met by my particular shamanic skill set. Guide my day in the divine marketplace, today. Help me be a sacred merchant, today. Help me try and try and try, today, for to be a professional shaman who is well-serving community means to ever be resurrected, both in my private life and daily in my commitment to the market place.” (I support all definitions of shamanism. This paragraph is specific to a moment in time.)

I post this today, because my heart needs to touch someone who will understand my pain, my commitment, my happiness in my work, and in hopes the post will help them. Please tell me if you understand and/or if this post helps.

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Here’s a description of my shamanic counseling sessions. And you can schedule online. http://www.outlawbunny.com/pastoral-counseling/

A Faerie Retreat, Created Especially for You

imageNeed renewal and pampering, but can’t get away? Want to sit with a shaman to increase your mystic skills, but travel not an option?

Would you like a private, guided “astral retreat,” right where you live?

Receive a three-week shamanic ritual intensive, tailored to you. Your needs and wishes tended to. Your “astral retreat” consists of:

1) Two one-hour private phone sessions a week, for three weeks. The only time you need to take is our meetings—and huge shifts occur. You will be hoodooed: I channel six experiences to nourish and empower your unique spirit more than some people will believe possible. Sessions also help manifest your mystical, business-related, or other goals.

2) Direct spiritual transmissions five days a week, without you doing a thing. Go about your business, I’ll do the work for you. Note: I don’t decide what kind of energy you receive. I am a conduit, the Divine sends what suits you, whether that is physical healing, removal of blocks to prosperity, intensification of your shamanic skill, all of these, or something else.

3) If you want assignments (to do between sessions), I tailor them to your needs and schedule. Examples: gentle nurturing acts that are easy to fit into your day; or challenging rituals that increase shamanic power. If you don’t want assignments, I tailor our sessions to accommodate that.

Faerie art, Francesca De Grandis

Visit me in my astral home, we will travel. Faerie art, Francesca De Grandis

Individually, services included in the retreat would cost $1350:
– Six private sessions, $750.
– Three weeks of transmissions, $600

In appreciation of your making self-care a priority, your total cost is $1000.

Questions? Prefer payment plan? Call 814-337-2490.

I can create personalized retreats for a limited number of folks. I cleared my schedule to help the retreat fits into yours; other work may dominate my schedule soon. Choose one of the three-week periods below. After payment, if you live in the U,S., I’ll call you to schedule appointments. If you live outside the U.S., call me to schedule appointments: 814-337-2490.

Fine print:
* After registering, if a crisis requires you delay, I give you six weeks to complete your six phone sessions, but cannot refund.
* If you must change an appointment time, I need 24 hours’ notice, or you lose that appointment.

You can do our appointments on a lunch break or with child in your lap. I take care of you. Scroll down to pick your three weeks.


Choose one of the three-week periods below.




Hiding, Healing, Power. Pt 3

Dear site visitor, I want you to see the Faerie tale illustrations at their best. When WordPress shrinks a pic to fit the page, it blurs. Please click on a painting to see it unblurred; it makes a real difference.

 

 

 

Hiding, Healing, Power. Part Three
Written and painted in March and/or early April, 2012.

Part one: https://stardrenched.com/2012/06/13/hiding-healing-power/
Part two: https://stardrenched.com/2012/06/27/hiding-healing-power-pt-2/ 

Part Three
When she grew up, something else wonderful happened. That little girl grew up to be Goddess Diana—Great Mother, Light-Bearer.

Faerie art, Francesca De Grandis

Diana, Great Mother Goddess. Available as a limited first edition print. For more info, click on the picture.

A child became a deity, yes. Yes, she did. Let yourself hide.

Hiding is not always about shame or fear. It might be a time of preparation or privacy, a time of beauty or empowerment, a time of nurturance or growth.
 
Faerie art, Francesca De GrandisHiding can be motivated by discretion.

A hiding child became a deity, a bearer of light, a light held high. The woman no longer hiding.
 
That little girl was always god. But she needed discretion to find it.

Diana lived with her cat who was secretly a Faerie. (See Aradia, Gospel of the Witches, for lore about Diana and her Fey Cat.)

The woman, the Goddess, hung a welcome sign on her front door. People came to see her. (Mind you, she still hid a lot of the time, and we will get to that in a moment.) She healed people with her light. Or tickled them with it. She used her light to guide others to their own shiny brilliance and to that of the Gods.

Here is the welcome sign she hung up. Faerie art, Francesca De Grandis
Faerie art, Francesca De GrandisDiana is Goddess of Witches. This warm, protective deity has given me tremendous solace and healing many times over the years.

Often, her visitors hid with her. That was fun.

And sometimes—often, in fact—she still hid all by herself. Well, her cat was with her. As were other gods. They are always nearby.

Tucked in her home, she traveled to wonderful places.

Faerie art, Francesca De GrandisHer visitors went on great adventures with her, traveling between the stars.

Faerie art, Francesca De Grandis

Where You and Diana Go if You Visit Her. Available as a limited first edition print. For more info, click on the picture.

 When someone is hiding, I look twice to find the god. The end.

Faerie art, Francesca De Grandis

Storyteller (the author, self-portrait). Available as a limited first edition print. For more info, click on the picture

 Please use the nifty Facebook, Twitter, and Google+ buttons, right below, to share my Faerie tale. Thank you for your support, it’s the only way many folks will know about my new story and refurbished site (the site you are on has been updated lately with a new look and all sorts of other new stuff). I cannot do it without you! If you do not see the buttons, you’re viewing this blog entry on my site’s home page. Just click this: https://stardrenched.com/2012/07/11/hiding-healing-power-pt-3/

Hiding, Healing, Power. Pt 2

If you missed part one, here it is: https://stardrenched.com/2012/06/13/hiding-healing-power/

Faerie art, Francesca De Grandis

Hiding - Fey Strega in Training

Hiding, Healing, Power. Part two
Written and painted in March and/or early April, 2012.

This little Italian girl is another example of someone hiding. Why do you think she is hiding?

Dear site visitor, I want you to see the Faerie tale illustrations at their best. When WordPress shrinks a pic to fit the page, it blurs. Please click on a painting to see it unblurred; it makes a real difference.

Everyone who hides has a story. What is yours? It is okay if you hide some of it.

Here is part of hers (she wants to hide the rest): When she first hid, she had a pretty place in her mind. She started building it. First, she made the window frame you see her peeking out of.

She lived behind it with her Faerie cat. She giggled there a lot. The cat dozed in brilliant shafts of sun light that came through the window. As she slept, she dreamt up schemes for the little girl. They had many adventures, and no one saw. Except other Faeries. So many giggles!

It took a long time, a lot of work, and a lot of hiding to build more. (Sometimes you hide to find quiet magic, so that you can even imagine secret places in your mind.)

For years, all she had was that window frame to hide behind. But it kept her safe. I mean, look at all the detail she put into it!

Little Bunny in a Tea Cup. Available as a limited first edition print. For more info, click on the picture

And by the time she had grown up, her home was finished.

Faerie art, Francesca De Grandis

Want to know what adventures she had as a grown up? I’ll post part 3 in two weeks here. I blog once a week, and am alternating between this blog and the blog at my other site. Two blogs with two separate RRS feeds.

Please use the nifty Facebook, Twitter, and Google+ buttons, right below, to share my Faerie tale. Thank you for your support, it’s the only way many folks will know about my new story and refurbished site (the site you are on has been updated lately with a new look and all sorts of other new stuff).  I cannot do it without you! If you do not see the buttons, you’re viewing this blog entry on my site’s home page. Just click this https://stardrenched.com/2012/06/27/hiding-healing-power-pt-2/

Hiding, Healing, Power

Faerie art, Francesca De GrandisHiding, Healing, Power
Written and painted in March and/or early April, 2012.

I call the following piece a Faerie tale. That is accurate but not by most standards. The piece is part my thoughts, part my paintings, part my methods for empowerment (perhaps in less overt forms, such as asking you a question), mixed with little magical stories told through word and visuals. By my definition of shamanism, that is a faerie tale: The sum total helps you live in myth—live in myth generally speaking, and in the particular myths I’m creating here, and in your own unique myths that this piece can help you find and/or better dwell in.

I painted the illustrations brush stroke by stroke—digitally. I just paint on a computer screen instead of a canvas. And with that:

Hiding Fey Warrior In Training. Click on the painting to see it large and without blurring that occurs when WordPress shrinks a pic to fit the page.

Part One

This is a Faerie tale about healing and power. And about hiding. This story is for grown ups.

Sometimes we need to hide. There are many reasons. We might have to hide because we hurt. We find a safe, secret place to heal, or at least to be away from whatever might hurt us.

Do you ever hide? Do you need to tell someone why? Or is it better that no one knows you are hiding?

Sometimes we hide because it is fun.

Sometimes we hide to be alone with our thoughts.

Or with our “imaginary” friends.

Hiding, Faerie Healer in Training. Available as a limited first edition print. For more info, click on the picture.

When children have to repeatedly hide to protect themselves, it can injure their spirit in ways that haunt them into adulthood. But they’re doing the best they know how to keep themselves safe, and that is an act of power.
 
Hiding can also be an act of power when motivated instead by happy events and sweet wishes. We don’t always stay out of sight because of fear and pain; for example, you might simply tuck yourself away in a special place for a while, in order to flourish undisturbed. 

Some people hide to gain powers that only come where no one—without those powers—can see them. They work hard and often joyfully, secretly doing what the Cosmos asks of them. That is what this little Fey fellow is doing—he is a Faerie healer in training.

And perhaps he is also making himself safe from trouble; if you ask him sincerely, he might tell you. Or maybe he’ll just keep peeking out at you from his hiding place.

I’ll post part 2 in two weeks, here. I blog once a week, and am going to try alternating between this and the blog at my other site. Two blogs with two separate RRS feeds.

Please share the URL to my above story; here it is to copy and paste for Facebook or an email or whatever: https://stardrenched.com/2012/06/13/hiding-healing-power/    I want folks to know about my new Faerie tale and my refurbished site (the site you are on has been updated lately with a new look and all sorts of other new stuff). Thank you for your support. I cannot do without it, truly! Oh, wait…I am so 20th century! Unless you’re viewing this blog entry on my site’s home page, you can like my Faerie tale with the nifty Facebook button, right below, next to the Twitter button and the like. Duh!

The Ecstatic Path, Serving Community, & False Ego

The Ecstatic Path, Community Service, and Arrogance

A few thoughts, May Day, 2012
Updated May, 2022

Detail from Root Woman, painting by Francesca De Grandis

Detail, Root Woman, Digital Art, Francesca De Grandis .

The occult shop I worked in during the 80s had lockers out back, behind the building. Our customers would buy candles, which we would dress (for example, anoint with magical oils), bless, and then burn in the lockers. Some customers requested candles for prosperity blessings. Some asked for healing candles. The variety of magical candles covered every imaginable situation from justice to romance.

By some standards, it was such an odd priesthood, if not utterly dismissed and invalidated. The bunch of grungy lockers with wax dripping all over them was part of something many would consider hokey, outright ridiculous. But it was the real deal—powerful magic that was of service to community.

Priesthood (ministry, service, call it what you will) takes many sincere forms. Some have more prestige than others. But whether one receives a lot of acclaim or none at all, the Gods know when the heart is filled with juicy desire to serve. This desire fuels our joy constantly. And the Gods bless such a heart with peace and happiness.

The ecstatic path I walk includes a commitment to serve.

The Gods also know when the heart is heavily burdened, made sad by a self-deceiving ego-drive to be at the top of the heap. And the Gods bless this heart, too. This compassion is sorely needed for individuals who don’t understand that service fueled by the desire for prestige and ego-feed will only get them snared by false ego, which twists their magic in knots so it works against them. Goddess help them. They can end up on a hard road! I know this because I had to learn it through personal experience.

Decades back, I went into media to serve my Gods. I’m a shy and reclusive person who did not want to be in media, I just wanted to remain in oral tradition, but my Gods insisted I also enter the media. And sometimes, working in the media, my thoughts dwelt on fame or ego. When they did, it hurt me, what a mess! Luckily, my overall reason for being in media was service, so I was able to spot my arrogance and move past it. … Well, I still am arrogant to some degree, but I imagine all humans are. As long as I remain aware of when my false ego is leading the way, and I make ongoing attempts to stop that, I think I am OK.

I am amazed at the amount of serenity to which I have become accustomed. I have noted that, when my arrogance comes alive, my serenity does not remain at the level that’s become typical of me. When serving my Gods in sincerity, Their peace flows through me to empower my work. I can have a reasonable degree of serenity and, therefore, my health is good, my abundance continues, and from my peace emerges ecstasy. So mote it be.

As to the aforementioned ego drive to be at the top of the heap, ha! There is no heap. There is only the joyous dance of life and the chance to serve within it. May all we humans learn at deeper and deeper levels to dive into life fully, not mistaking titles and pomp for ecstasy and caring. And may we always know that ecstasy and caring go hand in hand, like lovers.

Root Woman, painting by Francesca De Grandis

Root Woman, painting by Francesca De Grandis. If you’d like a limited first edition-print of this art, email me at outlawbunny at outlawbunny.com

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With its relaunch in 2012, this site was split between three servers. (I know there are other options, it’s a long and grassroots story.)

http://www.stardrenched.com is mostly for the site’s blog, events announcements, and new additions to the site’s Grimoire.

The site’s original domain remains https://people.well.com/user/zthirdrd/. Among other things, it has online Grimoire entries prior to 2012.

Way back, there wasn’t space for everything I wanted on the well.com site (my site there is ancient, started back when they were very few women on the web, and site storage space was minuscule), so some side pages got put on feri.com.

This old blog explains it a bit more.

I continue to blog at my other site, www.outlawbunny.com. Two separate blogs.