Tag Archives: mysteries

Fairy Secrets

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What Does “Fairy Secrets” Mean?

What Are “Fairy Secrets”?

“Fairy Secrets” refers to mystical experiences that miraculously transform a person and their life.

Explaining the difference between Fairy Secrets and other transformative mysticism is difficult. Mystical experiences tend to be indescribable. But my heart recognizes Fey qualities. And it’s not important to state, “This is Fey, and that is not.” In fact, that can cause you trouble. What matters is transformations, respect for otherworldly experiences, and the power they give us to take care of ourselves and Gaia’s children.

By serving others, I don’t mean you have to give other people those experiences. There are other magical ways to help. And help does not have to be magical. Serving others might mean making chicken soup for a sick neighbor. Or patiently listening to a friend who needs to vent. Or helping save a forest. Head in the clouds, feet on the ground. One reason we are gifted otherworldly experiences is because they inspire us to care for ourselves and others. This includes worldly care.

Here’s another way to look at it:

Fairy Gods Give Us Miracles

Fairy Secrets are magic spells cast by the Fairy Queen, King, and Their court to help us out. The spells cause otherworldly events that bring miraculous changes. They can be called “miraculous” because they’re beyond a human’s usual power to create. Or they might have otherwise seemed impossible.

What to Do After the Fairy Gods Give You a Miracle

Often, the changes are permanent, if you nurture them.

Here are some suggestions for nurturing them:

* If the mystical experience provided a spiritual breakthrough, try to maintain spiritual practices.
* If there was a magical breakthrough, try to keep improving and using your magic.
* Serve others. This also helps stop magic from becoming addictive escapism instead of a healthy tool.

What Kind of Change
Can a Fairy Secret Give You?

A Fairy Secret can create freedom from an inner and/or outer restriction that limited you severely and was impossible to overcome previously. The limit might’ve been emotional, societal, or other. It might have existed your entire life.

A person might acquire joy, magic, confidence, money, and fulfillment that everyone, including themselves, said was impossible.

Fairy Secrets Are Not Arrogant Dogmas

I cannot tell you how often I have counseled an individual who was devastated by an arrogant Witch teacher:

A teacher who fosters colonizer culture insists that only a special few can receive and bestow Fairy Secrets. Dogma!

Fairy Secrets are not passwords, whispered to a select few who gate-keep magical power.

Those few usually boast about Fairy Secrets. If they were true Secrets, the boasts would make them vanish.

Those few hurt themselves. Arrogance and dogma close the heart and path to Fairy Secrets. This is another reason that proclaiming, “This is Fey, and that is not” is a problem.

Fairy Secrets Are Not Ideas

Logical words cannot convey Fairy Secrets. Mysteries transcend fixed definitions. However, the Mysteries can be experienced, during major rituals and at significant life crossroads.

Music, poetry, dance, painting, etc., can point us toward Fey Mysteries.

Please note: I don’t usually consider Mysteries and Secrets to be synonymous. I am using them synonymously here. I will point out exceptions. Or context will make them obvious.

Fairy Secrets Are Alive.
All Mysteries Are Alive

Anything alive is ever-shifting. Magic changes from precious, unique moment to moment. Magic is a science with fixed rules, but so is meteorology, and the weather changes from day to day and place to place. Colonizer culture teaches us that everything is fixed, repeatable, and unvarying. Colonizer culture is death culture.

Shamanic culture is the opposite. Understanding life’s constant mutability allows us to see the precious, unique moment.

So, let’s say I experience a Mystery that brings me deep deep inside myself and/or other realms, within moments. And thus I am completely in touch with my power and my life goal. I have been given a wonderful gift. However, it is not an object to gain and own forever. It was a moment in time and requires follow-through. There are many ways that a vision can go wrong afterwards.

For example, I have encountered people who thought their remarkable vision made them superior to other people. Or who used their visions to invalidate mystical experiences unlike their own. Their made themselves and others miserable. This is another reason that “This is Fey, and that is not” is problematic.

Amazing visions are actually quite common. The measure of a person is what they do after a vision. (Sometimes, a mystical experience can go wrong right then and there. That’s beyond the scope of this essay, but feel free to contact me if you need help.)

A Fairy Secret Is Not the Ultimate Goal,
But a Step along Life’s Road

A Witch teacher who buys into colonizer culture tells their students that once you have “the” Fairy Secrets, you have reached the ultimate goal.

In traditional Fairy Witchcraft, experiencing a Fairy Secret is not the end of the road, but a step along it.

We can’t rest on our laurels.

Fairy Secrets are part of life, not excluded to a single moment during which a hierarchical Witch sits on their high horse and deigns to bestow a Mystery.

More about Fairy Secrets as Living Mysteries

The living breath of a Fairy Secret is suffocated by dogma and the arrogant use of words. Fairy Secrets are not specific spellings of occult words, a rule about how to pronounce words, or other dogma. Those who try to trap Mysteries in verbal and prescriptive boxes limit their experiences.

The Fey Folk don’t care whether someone calls them Fairy, Faerie, Faery, or Fred. But they avoid people with arrogant pretensions. … Well, kind and good Fey avoid pretentious people. Evil Fey will gather to harm them.

Finding Fairy Secrets Requires Freedom

Freedom and loving support open a path to Mysteries.

A so-called Fairy Secret that is part of a dogmatic oppressive lesson does not change life for the better. At best, it is a temporary fix.

This is not to say that you cannot learn magical techniques that help you experience Fey Mysteries.

Mysteries Vanish Until You Need Them Again

Here, when I use the word Mystery, I’m not referring to Fairy Secrets alone. When we enter a Mystery, we receive Divine guidance about our challenges and life path. Obstacles clear. Fairy Secrets lovingly surround you, centering you in your magical, miraculous, Fey, self.

If we discover a Mystery that will sustain us through a lifetime, the sustenance will likely come and go. Even if we intellectually remember the Mystery, its vibrancy comes and goes. And it is that vitality that sustains us.

Instead of that lifelong Mystery, I suspect we are just as likely to experience one we need solely to take the immediate steps toward a life goal. Then we receive only the guidance and power that we need in the moment.

The Gods Give Different Fairy Secrets
to Different Witches

Fairy Witches might have Fairy Secrets in common, but everyone has their own as well. In traditional Fairy Witchcraft, what is healthy and profound for one Witch might be unhealthy and harmful for another. Or at least a time-wasting, wild goose chase that derails you from reaching your heart’s desire. So the Fey Gods reveal different things to different people. Fairy Secrets enchant you and your life to provide what you need.

Fairy Secrets and Witch Teachers

A teacher can lead you toward the Fairy Mysteries. You can also find the Secrets on your own.

Going it alone is better than having a teacher who thinks their classes are the sole path to Mysteries. Ditto a teacher who thinks you need to receive all wisdom from them.

A good teacher recognizes that you have your own wisdom. And they surely do not think that their classes are the sole door to miracles.

A good teacher is invaluable support. They can make meeting a Fairy Secret likelier and safer. A mystical experience powerful enough to create a miraculous change can have pitfalls. A teacher can help you avoid them during the experience. After it, a good teacher offers follow-up lessons to avoid problems and maintain the improvement. Again, Fairy Secrets are not the end goal. They are steps in the process of building better lives for ourselves and all of Gaia’s children.

Pointing to Fairy Secrets

A good Fairy Witchcraft teacher points to Secrets, provides techniques to find them, and opens paths, instead of spelling Secrets out. Again, Mysteries are not theoretical explanations. Directing a student’s attention, providing techniques, and opening paths empowers them, because they have to do their part of the work. No one can hand you a Fairy Secret.

That is one reason that rituals can be remarkably effective. In my classes, you don’t have to listen to me drone on theoretically. I lead experiential rituals. They are transformative beauty—ecstatic mysticism that can make worldly and spiritual dreams come true. This paragraph relates not just to Fairy Secrets but also to ongoing miraculous shifts that are part of an enchanted life.

A few individuals wanted me to hand them a Mystery, doing all the work for them, instead of guiding them to their own experience. They were disappointed in my rituals.

There is one way I kind of hand my students Fairy Secrets: During my classes, I give spiritual transmissions as well as lead rituals. However, the recipient still has to do their part. You might think of it like this:

I help people tune into other realms, through rituals I channel and spiritual transmissions. And everyone has to do their part.

It is usually a few simple things, such as having an open mind. And willingness to be in a spiritual and magical process, instead of thinking like a consumer who is acquiring an object.

It is not that I demand that anyone to do anything. For example, you decide whether you will join in a chant. However, simply being in a ritual or magic class might feel silly to someone. If they risk feeling foolish and bear their discomfort, it can give way to childlike delight that makes magic bloom. Risking foolishness is one of the few simple acts needed to open to Fairy Secrets and other miracles during my events.

Fairy Secrets: The Fairy Queen’s breath lightly on my eyes with the Fey King’s kiss on my forehead enchanted everything.—Francesca De Grandis

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Fairy Witch, Francesca De Grandis, is the bestselling author of Be a Goddess!. She is also a star-drenched dragon, lucky charm, star-child, and full-time community Witch for forty years. She uses magic to fight colonizer culture and help wild hearts thrive, in long-distance classes, psychic readings, and healings. Her Goddess spirituality embraces practical magic. Trained from birth in a Shamanic family tradition, her Witchcraft is blessed by ancestors. Her Fairy Witchcraft is also called Faerie Shamanism. European Witchcraft has traditionally been Shamanic for many practitioners. Francesca developed Shamanic theories, methods, and rituals that have been a seminal influence on modern Paganism and alternative spirituality.

Chaos, Dragons, and the Magna Mater

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Chaos, Dragons, and the Magna Mater
Fey Mysteries

stregarose2Chaos has been vilified throughout human history. Yet it is from chaos that all creation comes.

The Bible lied when it said God spoke into the chaos—the darkness—to create the cosmos. No mere word created us or anything else. The chaos, which is often called darkness, is both darkness and light, and is the Great Mother Goddess—the Magna Mater. She, with Her fertile chaos body, gave birth to all existence.

Note my last sentence: She, with Her fertile chaos body, gave birth to all existence. Usually creation myths refer to the darkness and chaos as passive, not active participants in creation. I worded my sentence carefully. She, with Her fertile chaos body, gave birth to all existence. How different that is from the myth of Tiamat as the supposedly demonic dragon who was primordial chaos and killed by Marduk, who then divided her body to create the universe, part of her body making the heavens and part of her body making the earth.

The implications of that myth have led to one nightmare after another for humankind.

stregamoonAffirmation: I will not be cleaved in two. I remain whole. I recognize the loving chaos and loving darkness within me. I refuse to bow to misrepresentations of them. I see within myself both my loving darkness and loving light. Each day, I know in myself the Dragon, Great Mother Goddess, the Magna Mater, Who loves all of existence and all humankind. I serve Her throughout my day by doing what I love and by lovingly serving all I encounter. With my fertile chaos dragon body, I can birth all existence; I have the power to manifest my heart’s desires.

stregaroseThe implications of the Biblical myth that God spoke into the chaos—the darkness—to create the cosmos have led to one nightmare after another for humankind.

No, no mere word created us. That was a lie so that we’d succumb to oppressors’ words and fear Her Divine chaos. The oppressors’ priests wanted to rip us from our own fertility and the magic to create our own worlds.

If there was a word, it was a poem, a chant, a magical spell, a cry of exultation, a cry of purest joy, a cry of purest love, from the Goddess and God, as They made love in the process of existence coming into being. No almighty God condescendingly divided light from darkness. No no no. The Magna Mater drew the light from Her own body. That light is Her Son Whom She loves. Unlike the God of the Bible, She does not distain Her other half.

stregamoonChaos still reigns today, beneficent, though we divide it into hours and moments, schedules and goals, as if the weave of life was like a weaving on a human’s loom—line after parallel line laid out precisely, everything organized in a linear manner like a grid. No, chaos—Goddess—weaves every which way, and yet the garment She weaves is a life that fits us more perfectly than the most carefully woven garment we ourselves could make, a life more beautiful than any we ourselves could weave.

Through generations and lifetimes, society’s weaving of lies and suppression have robbed witches of their immersion in and trust of chaos. From chaos, that dark matter where there is also light, comes our magic.

stregamoonMy worldview—the world I just spelled out—underlies my teachings.

Dragons are descendants of the original chaos. My worldview helps reveal the hidden underpinnings of draconian magic.

stregamoon

An attribution regarding my remark “The Magna Mater drew the light from Her own body. That light is Her Son Whom She loves.” In the book, Aradia, Gospel of the Witches, the Goddess draws the light from Herself and sees it as Her brother, with whom She falls in love. It is a beautiful myth that you might want to read. I also need to give another reference: in that myth, the Goddess and God make love to create the cosmos, and it is a magical spell.

Dear reader, my above essay is in a course I teach called Dragon Magic and in my course about a Faerie Shaman oracle deck I created. To be kept abreast of upcoming classes, Fey freebies, and other offerings, click the banner below:
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A Beautiful Goddess and a Dirty Spoon

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Remains

A Beautiful Goddess and a Dirty Spoon:
Kitchen Magic

Even the remains of breakfast—egg shells, tangerine peels, a dirty dish and spoon—are blessings on me.

A blessing: the remains of this meal flooded by sunlight pleases my eyes.

A blessing: to eat today and nourish my body is beautiful—such a gift!

For me, to be a kitchen witch means to acknowledge and appreciate the immensity of the harvests given me by my beautiful Goddess and to gift others in kind.

Today I will make a donation to feed a hungry child.

A blessing: to have some money to help someone in one of the most important ways—food.

To be able to give is such a gift. Were I to instead view giving as magnanimous on my part, it would imply that I was bending down from on high to help someone less worthy. I’d be denying who they are by turning them into a character in a story I’d written to pump up my ego. Instead, we are all in this together. Farming communities have long understood that it is by having each others’ backs that we all survive and thrive. It is a lie perpetuated by the American upper class that the best way to “make it” is on our own, climbing over the backs of others.

Getting to give is a gift. It is part of the cycle of life, a gate into the sacred circle, a consecration of the four directions, and one of the great mysteries. Giving is a chance to be a human being—such a gift! Giving is a chance to be with another human being (even if you never meet them because you’re donating to an organization that serves them)—such a gift!

BYABar4

 

Spirit Doll

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SpiritDoll1Sometimes our friends/clients don’t need “help,” even if we have skills capable of creating positive change for those we serve. Sometimes we serve a person best by investing our skill set in honoring them—and their circumstances—exactly as they are.

Here’s an example. I know someone who’s suffered extraordinary difficulties for years. I foolishly wanted to meddle—”save” her. I wanted to give her spiritual healings. I wanted to teach her shamanic exercises to become stronger. I wanted to show her abilities she doesn’t know she has. I wanted to make a protective amulet to ward off negative energy around her. I wanted to, I wanted, I wanted. None of it was what she wanted … or needed.

Mind you, everything I longed to do for her is perfect for many of my clients. And could be perfect for her at another time.

But the following is what I did. I made her a totem. As I chose objects for it, I let go of what I thought was “right” for her. Instead, I selected items to honor and celebrate who she already is.

The totem’s sole purpose (oh my, voice-recognition translated that as “soul purpose”) was to represent how wonderful she is. I completely let go of all other agendas. That included releasing the thought that her experience of my celebration might empower her to make changes I felt could help her with her struggles. She knows best, not me.

So there’s a long bone bead with stars in it, because if anybody has stars in her bones, it’s this woman. The wood is European Elder—sambucus nigra—and is a piece so young that it’s mostly soft, spongy pulp—fragile, as are we all. Its youth also gives it a wondrous sensitivity like my friend’s, and a gentle, subtle, yet dynamic magic that my friend has. The ladybug portrays another aspect of that.

SpiritDoll2

Three luminescent cobalt beads represent the mysteries she lovingly serves. A bead that is probably tiger’s eye and one that is probably goat horn represent how down-to-earth she is; she modestly infuses sacredness into her daily mundane responsibilities, though they are immense and humble.

A purple bead symbolizes the beauty of her spirit and the beauty she gifts people around her. A leaf indicates her care of Gaia’s children. I made the wool bead on top because … well, she’ll know why. And I had to add something sparkly because she is Fey.

At some point in its creation, this wall-hanging chose to be a doll. (Heh, a wall-doll.) So I spun yarn (which I felted a bit to help it set, since its winding wouldn’t be held tight by a weaving or the like) to shape the body.

Is “totem doll” an actual term? … This totem doll represents her spirit. … The term “spirit doll” is popular nowadays. … I could call it a “poppet,” because that’s a term for a doll used in magic. Not that I expect my friend to do spells with this, unless she wants to, but this doll was used magically in that I blessed it. And to play with words, “poppet” is a traditional term of endearment; making this artifact was an expression of love.

SpiritDoll3Creating the poppet was an unexpected gift to myself: I no longer need to fret about someone I hold dear. Affirming some of this woman’s wonderful attributes reminded me she has many other amazing powers, so needs no rescuer; she has every resource she needs within her, including the ability to ask for help when she requires it.

In case someone reads this post as an either/or proposition: I do not usually choose between helping friends/clients create positive change and honoring them exactly as they are. Most of the time, serving them both ways is beneficial.

Facilitating shifts they want in themselves and in their lives is a more respectful process if I also mirror back to them, in word, visual art, or ritual, their beauty and power—including that which is hidden to most eyes and that which they do not even see themselves.

It feels important to mention this sort of mirroring and affirming of those around us can require as much skill, thoughtfulness, and magic as does helping them make changes. For example, I have the psychic ability to see the beauty and power in people, even if they cannot.

Why is it important to mention the skills involved? Because people with lots of skills for creating change can feel frustrated when they can’t use those abilities for someone they care about. But you can apply your gifts another way—to honoring someone just as they are—and accomplish something vitally important. People need to be respected for who they already are. People need to be fully met right where they are.

Sometimes trying to “help” someone robs them of dignity. If instead, we honor them as they follow whatever path they choose, achieve victories that are important to them (as opposed to victories you think they need to gain), make the mistakes they need to make, and explore the parts of themselves they think vital to explore, we give an invaluable respect. That respect is also known as “love.” So mote it be.

BoSNwsltrSm

Cleansing Away Negative Influences

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Traditional Purification Spell Adapted for Modern Pagans

EggWLvs

This time-honored ritual cleanses you of negative energy that you have accumulated. Even if outright evil’s touched you, this spell can help take care of it.

It is simple: rub a raw egg over your whole body. Do not break the egg; you’re rubbing the unbroken egg, still in the shell, all over yourself.

A modern twist: If you’re concerned about salmonella, hard boil the egg first. Do you have an opinion about whether a hard-boiled egg would be as effective? Let me know. Here’s my opinion:

I prefer the traditional spell. I’d also prefer a world in which salmonella was not even an issue. And I’m not going to give up eggs for breakfast or for magic, just because we live in an imperfect world. That would be letting the negativity of the world get to me.

Magic is a tool to deal with an imperfect world and make it better. This spell helps rid me of the negative influences of this imperfect world. So I adapt the spell.

Also, I think the effort of hard-boiling somewhat compensates for the loss of the vibrance in a raw egg. Your effort is a form of energy, a vibrancy unto itself, which adds to the spell. I don’t mean you have to have any intention of that when you boil the egg. Your effort is simply energy, without you even trying to make it so.

If you feel the need to further compensate, I wrote liturgy for that purpose. Say it right before you rub the egg on yourself: “This egg is part of the circle of life. By this and by the ancient Mysteries which have long empowered this spell for witches, I shall be cleansed.”

Traditionally, you then throw the egg into running water, such as a river or stream. If that’s an insane option—e.g., you can’t reach running water without traveling an unreasonable distance, or winter has frozen the nearby river, here are modern alternatives:

Wherever you dispose of it, be sure it’s far away, where negative energy the egg has taken on does not come into contact with anyone, and where the elements can purify the negativity away.

When I had really good plumbing and lived urban, I’d smash the egg into my toilet bowl and flush it. I figure that constituted running water, LOL. Then clean your toilet, so no egg remains.

But if you have poor plumbing, or a group does this ritual so there is more than one egg to get rid of, you might clog your toilet.

You can bury the eggs, unless e.g., winter has frozen the ground stone hard.

If I was going to do it here, in winter weather, I’d walk to the woods on my property. They’re a fair distance from my house. Then I’d hurl the egg even further away, into the woods.

I wouldn’t compost it usually, because compost tends to be kind of close to the house.

This is a simple but powerful rite. I only use it for big problems. In other words, this imperfect life keeps throwing garbage at us, so we need to keep cleansing it off, instead of letting it get to us. That sort of cleansing is comparable to the usual ongoing cleaning a house gets: You wash the dishes, vacuum the rug, and so on. But occasionally, you shampoo the rug, because a lot of crud accumulated or there was a big spill. It is deep cleaning time! In the same vein as the rug shampooing, the egg rite is really more for bigger problems.

And it is not beneath the most spiritual people. I have two clients who inspire and uplift me with their integrity, beauty, and sheer radiance, but I taught them this ritual recently. No matter how attuned we are, we occasionally let the major yuckiness we meet get under our skin.

I love channeling new spells, but sometimes the oldies are perfect. I’m grateful they’ve been in my repertoire for many years. I’m also grateful the Muse sent me adaptations. Blessed be.

NewsPrpl

Ethical (and Unethical) Fey Teachers

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Info about December 2020 update is at bottom of post.

Eagle with Iris in Great Darkness, OutlawBunny.

Ethical (and Unethical) Fey Teachers

Overview: Fey Folk can help us find freedom and joy. But there are evil Fairies, too—the Unseelie. They want to hurt humans. Some witch teachers work with the Unseelie. Honor your wild heart, but stay safe.

Fey Folk Can Help Us Find Freedom, Joy, and Magic

For hundreds of years, fairy glimmers in the woods have beckoned, reflecting our secret longings and illuminating our honest needs. Puritanical moralists insist the Fey are undeniably evil. However, we know better: the Good Folk can help free us from repressive religions and absurd social strictures. (Good Folk is another name for Fairies.) In addition, when we are barraged by a logic that denies magic and miracles, that fairy glimmer reassures us, telling us that mysticism is real and that the wondrous is possible.

But not all dwellers of the fairy realms are beneficent.

The Seelie Queen, Unseelie Queen, and Evil Magicians

For our purposes, this oversimplified definition of Seelie and Unseelie works well:

The Faery Queen (Fairy Queen, Faerie Queen…) is also known as the Seelie Queen and Her court known as the Seelie court. She and Her Seelie want to help us. They devote Themselves to that … when they are not off having a great time dancing, singing, and otherwise carrying on. … And even their joyful activities ring through the cosmos blessing us. However, there is an Unseelie Court–Fairies who are evil. The Unseelie Queen and her followers malevolently perpetuate great tragedy for humans.

And not all fey-touched magicians can be trusted, whether they call themselves Fey, Fay, Fae, Faerie, Feri, Fairy, or Faery.

Fulfill Your Longing and Stay Safe

Sate your hunger for luminous mystery and faerie mysticism, and for the fellowship thereof. However, it’s easy for that ferocious appetite, authentic and important though it is, to blind a person to the following: some individuals with immense glamour and fey power are pawns of the Unseelie Court. Perhaps this happens because power has made them so haughty that they are unwitting dupes for the forces of evil. Or perhaps they themselves become outright evil. Whatever the reason, it does happen.

Silence allows it to continue. I will not tolerate Fey practitioners who molest children, sexually harass students, disregard magical safety, and offer flashy curriculums that lack a moral compass strong enough to withstand the rigors of daily life. That lack of compass leaves many students frustrated and miserable for years because they’re working hard to grow without sufficient measures to guide them toward real spiritual progress. I’m available by phone if you’re concerned about yourself or a friend. I want to support newbies to the community—because they might be especially vulnerable—or anyone else who needs support.

Honor Your Wild Heart and Protect It

Francesca De Grandis, May 2012

While many cautions against the fey realms can be rightly interpreted as disguised attempts to suppress us, and to make us milquetoast, there are valid cautions. Dark mysteries needn’t be an excuse for a teacher to dominate. Wild hearts don’t mean that a teacher can ignore your sexual boundaries. Powerful magic needn’t lack caution. The quest for utter fulfillment needn’t lead to hollow longings or addiction.

There are dark mysteries that are wholesome, wildness that is authentic, satiation that is both attainable and ethical. Powerful magic can be safe. Fey fellowship, wild lovers, and powerful teachers can be both otherworldly and good. I hope you find them all.

If your Faerie heart resonates with what you read on this site, I invite you to my events. My newsletter will let you know about upcoming events, including free monthly Fey rituals via teleseminar or Zoom. Click the banner below to subscribe.

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Update: December 2020 I expanded on my above essay for clarity. I posted it on this site in 2012 and, before that, in 2008, to friends in a now defunct Yahoo forum. Sadly, the problems addressed by the post continue and happen to both newbies and longtime time witches. However, we can stop this. So mote it be!